ivy jessie allen

ivy – or ‘big ivy’ as she was known – was my nan.

despite being ‘big ivy’ she was in fact the ‘little’ ivy in the family. like all her sisters, they too named all their first born daughters after themselves, and so in our family you had big ivy/ little ivy, big violet/ little violet, big rosie/ little rosie – you get the picture. unlike all the others though, my nan was shorter than her daughter and so ‘big ivy’ was a mere 5ft 2 ins whilst ‘little ivy’ (my mum) was 5ft 10 ins tall. as a child, i always found this funny.

my nan was born on the 5th august 1910 in bermondsey. whilst i don’t know much about her mum, i do know that her dad was from cork in ireland. he had a green birth certificate – something that she was always proud of – and his name was william hitchman (born 1875). she was one of a few children, and if memory serves me well, her brothers and sisters comprised william (uncle bill), albert (uncle bert), rose (aunt rose) and violet (aunt vi). i think that there may have been one more brother who moved to the east end of london but i can’t be sure.

ivy spent most of her life working as an office cleaner, doing so right up until she retired. it seems strange now, but rarely did you ever see her out of her ‘workwear’, always having a wrap-around apron on. most of her cleaning jobs were in the city of london – phoenix house was one place that i always remember – but in later years, she also cleaned at gonzalez byas, a purveyor of sweet sherries and fortified wines (i took this from their website). gonzalez byas always sounded far more exotic than anything we could ever imagine, even though its offices were situated at the end of the estate in what was, a far from exotic location. it was though good for when i wanted to go and meet her from work.

she was brought up as a catholic although she left (forced?) the church in the 1930s when she had an illegitimate son by a jewish man. she named her son joseph (uncle joe). as for the father, i have only just realised that i have never asked anything about him although if she carried on her tradition, no doubt the father’s name also was joseph.

my nan remained a believer despite having left the church. instead of going back to church though, what she would do is give people (mainly mrs murfitt) money to go the the church, light a candle and say a prayer whenever anyone was ill or died. she also used to have a crucifix in the hall that had a vessel for holding holy water in it.

during the second world war, ivy met ernest allen (ernie – my grandad) who she then married on st patricks day, 17th march 1945. i believe that they met at the cinema. in 1946, they had their only child together, ‘little ivy’ (ivy priscilla allen or mum). it was around this time that they both moved into 119 elim estate, initially with ivy’s parents.

as ‘the custard skin stabbing‘ highlights, they had an eventful married life. overall, i think that it was a success and that when all was said and done, they loved each other an awful lot. in later years especially, ernie lived solely for her and was lost after she died.

over the years, ivy had a number of illnesses that following her retirement, made her largely housebound. despite her diabetes, cataracts, varicose veins, angina and everything else, she was a happy person despite being able to ‘turn on the waterworks’ at the drop of a hat. she did also use her illnesses sometimes to make others feel guilty – for this, read christmas day.

growing up, ivy would regularly remind me of her own mortality, telling me that if she saw me go to school, she would die happy: not necessarily the thing you want to hear when you’re four. she then did this for when i went into the juniors, secondary school, sixth form, work and reaching 21. unfortunately, reaching 21 was the last of the milestones she reached, dying in guys hospital on the 5th october 1987.

dying shortly after we had left the hospital on a sunday evening, the last thing she said was that she wanted her hair combed as she wanted to look nice.